One for the Daddy's

"A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty. "  - Unknown

 It's Fathers day. A day when dads of all race or creed are honored.  

Back in college I took courses on Child Development, Family Life and others that dealt with the human condition. Strange. If you ever see me you would never have thought that I even got to college. Well life is strange. What's more strange is the fact that despite my colorful college transcript, I actually learned a few things in school.

The textbook definitions of fatherhood is pretty much common sense. Procreate. Provide. Let them them go after college.  It is basically something like that.

Fatherhood is a great and complex responsibility.  Being one not only entails feeding, housing and providing for someone else related to you. Those are just the basics. As in business, warfare and romance, textbooks can only take you so far.  It is different when you are "on the ground" so to speak.   

To me, being a father is such a Herculean tasks that goes on until your last breathe has been exhaled. Definitely not  a laughing matter.. Being a dad involves shaping another  person's soul, developing them to be responsible, productive citizens of this world. Your kids are living proof that you once existed in this world.  In a nutshell, you should do humanity a favor by developing your children to be the "improved" versions of you.

By the way, I never had children.   I will never be a father. I missed the bus and I know myself. I would not be a good one anyway. 

The point of this writing is my own tribute to people I know that are great fathers to their children or maybe they have great dads themselves.

To those would be fathers that are much younger than I am, think of this as a "Daddy Fan page" kinda thing. Something scribbled by someone that wished he could have had kids and became a dad remotely close to the people I am writing about. 

There are no hard and fast rules or formulas for being a parent. Some guidelines and practical experience shared as one goes through the process helpsthough the best reference for fatherhood is your own experience .  How your own father was to you.

How I envy my friends and relatives that have been stupendous in their roles as daddies.  Some drop everything for their kid's in a heartbeat.  Some never miss a ball game.  A camping trip.  Some take them bonding to meaningful and not necessarily expensive trips.  Some taught their sons to drive themselves.  The words of wisdom during such events also impacts children immensely.

Children become adults.  When they do, they remember the walks on the beach, the barbecues, father and son camps, the kind words, the boxing lessons, the most expensive currency spent on them - time.

Rich or poor.  All will agree to what I have stated.  Time. Quality time and experiences spent with their fathers is something money will never be able to buy..With the wisdom that they drew from these experiences, they then pass it on to their children.  It is their legacy.  At that time both father and child did not quite realize the value of it until later on in their lives.

I myself do not have much memories of my own father. That says it all. But I am still proud of him because he did the right thing in the end. That is what is important.  It's not how you start but you finish the race that counts.

My daddy was a soldier.  A good soldier like his father before him and my great grandfather.  My father taught me three (3) things that I value to this day.

1. Chess

2. Shine Shoes

3. Shoot a gun

It maybe mundane to people but to me it has a more profound meaning.   Chess is all about strategy. When I was six years old, my father taught me this game. Unknowingly, it imbibed in me a sense of strategy.  i never was good at the game but in terms of strategy in general I would like to believe that "always having a plan" is better than Forrest Gumpin' it all the time. Even though it was "cemented" at a later age, my life plan has been mapped out.  

Shakespeare once said "The apparel maketh thle man".  In any gentleman's grooming reference material, shoes is like 70% of a man's wardrobe.  Isn't there a saying "You can tell a lot about a man by his shoes".   That me me a male Imelda Marcos.  I got more pairs than most guys and yes, I shine them regularly making them cleaner than the jungle where I live in.  

As for shooting, a man has to learn how to defend himself and his family.  It is not about being stupidly brave but by being a smart fighter.  In the process  also learned a thing or two about firearms, just enough.

I am appalled to hear about irresponsible fathers. Oftentimes in social occasions I meet guys that boast of having six, eight, maybe fifteen children with different women.  These guys boasts of their virility, how good they are at managing to sire children with these "hot", "younger" women.   I sit there and in the back of my head think "You stupid sack of shit idiot. You think you got one big dick by bringing in these children to this world and you earn 10$ a day, and a delusional drunk.   What will children's future be with an absentee father like you?  They will probably  starve, lie, steal, and probably be just like you or worse a criminal that ends up behind bars.  They will also end up hating you for bringing them into this Godforsaken life that they are enduring.".  Think about it.  Even rich guys do that.  They just provide a lttle more money for the basics but not much of the time.

During such times I just smile condescendingly at these idiot's rants.  I guess it is my way of thanking the Lord above that I was not born as stupid as this guy.  These guys must also have dicks the size of lined up quarters.  They use having children to "compensate".

To those of you that receive this, please accept this as my tribute to your splendid job that I think you are doing as a father.  I envy you though I more happy for you. 

Continue to take walks with your kids, to movies, laugh kiss and hug them.  Give your son extra cash for that date, lend him the car.  Encourage him when he goes on a date. Be there when they fall.  Send your daughter to that trip. Dress her to the nines. Make her feel even more beautiful and special. Love them more,  

If you notice that at times when I am with you and your families and I have that smile on my face.  It's nothing, just the joy that radiates from you and your family.  It is that kind of joy that I earlier mentioned that money can never buy.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY MY FRIEND!  You earned this accolade.  Continue.  "Age quod Agis" - Do what you are doing. Carry on.